Some days I can't pretend I'm not exhausted. Care worn. Some days I can't pretend that I don't feel disappointed and alone. There are days that I feel the weight of the code of silence we are taught from infancy in the guilt I feel for talking at all. The threat I will be rejected by those I love when they learn the truth.
And those I've loved, for the most part, don't want to know the truth. It's too ugly, too unpleasant, too real. Focusing on the positive and looking ahead are a big theme.
I'm sorry that I don't have a sunshine and roses history to share with you. I'm sorry that it wasn't Disney world and puppies. But it is what it was and I thought you wanted to know me. My cynicism and meanness surprises you. If you knew me better, it wouldn't surprise you.
So mostly I don't talk about it, I know you don't want to kn…